Another One Bites the Dust – In a Good Way

July 15, 2008 leahdanielle

I attended yet another wedding for one of my dearest friends.  It seems life is picking them off one by one.  Soon they’re all going to have “real jobs” and have bunches of ugly little children.  (No one in my circle of friends is going to have a single cute kid.  We’re going to be mercilessly punished by God for our ridicule of fat people, ugly babies, salesperson personality types, and friends that we don’t like anymore.  And also fat people. Nah, I’m just kidding.  Sort of…  I’m not kidding.)

This wedding was for my friend Darren, who I met in early high school through the church youth group.  The cool thing to do back then was to have a big crush on Darren.  I didn’t buy in because all of my friends were already viciously arguing over him.  I, instead, proceeded to date Mormons, COG good ol’ boys who couldn’t spell, and nerds that my mom felt sorry for.  Sidenote: the women in my life made me date nerdy boys that they felt sorry for. Ok, moving on…

Darren and I sang together in musicals and singing groups.  I used to tell him that when I was singing the Ooo’s and Aaaa’s during the intro of Avalon’s Wonder Why, I was actually telling him that he was awesome.  And as Darren juggled two or three of my friends’ hearts, we became good friends.  Eventually, I started dating the man who is now my husband, and Darren finally settled for only one of my friends.  We all roomed together in college.  Since then, a lot has changed, but not the feelings I have for my friend.

It was so silly, sitting at his wedding, prespiring undaintily, and feeling indignant that he wasn’t looking into the audience so that I could smile at him.  Why would he need me to smile at him?  His future wife was dolled up like a princess and was smiling plenty enough for everyone.  Like me smiling at him is going to make him think “Ah, now I can finally take that next step and marry this beautiful girl that I’ve been trying to marry all year long.  I’m so glad Leah smiled at me so that I could muster up that courage!”

Anyway, it was a funny feeling.  I haven’t really kept up with Darren well for the past few years.  Just a phone call or facebook message every once in a while, and maybe an occasional run-in at church.  But just the same, I love my friend and I want him to be happy, not sad.  And I’ve met girls who made him sad.  I guess part of me just felt a little jealous because I didn’t know who was supposedly making my friend happy and not sad.  But as I was feeling that twinge of jealousy, I was also happy to tears for both of them.  I don’t know Candace, but I know two things.  I know how lucky she is, because I know Darren.  And I know that everyone had supremely wonderful things to say about her and her family, and so I can figure he’s lucky too.  And that makes me happy – not sad, or jealous.

All in all, I’m proud of Darren; it was good to see him and all the other old friends from Lee, and I can’t wait until another one of my friends bites the dust!

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Entry Filed under: Married life,Random,Thoughts/Feelings/Ideas

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